Your wellbeing

The tools we give you

Everything here is optional and self-chosen. Nothing is forced on you. You can turn any of it on or off from your profile settings.

• Break reminders. A gentle heads-up when you have been chatting for a long stretch, so a break is your choice rather than an afterthought. Short breaks tend to leave people feeling more refreshed than pushing straight through.
• Wind-down nudges. When a scene has been building for a long time, a quiet reminder to ease off, breathe, and drink some water. Sustained tension without a break can leave you physically sore; there is no prize for pushing past comfortable.
• A daily time limit you set. Pick a number of minutes per day that feels right for you. We will give you a heads-up as you approach it, and if you ask us to, we will pause chat until the next day once you reach it.

Why this matters

Intensely rewarding experiences, this one included, work on the brain's reward system. For most people that is simply enjoyable. For some, over time, it can start to feel harder to control, or to take more to reach the same place. That pattern is real and recognised: the World Health Organization's ICD-11 classification includes Compulsive Sexual Behaviour Disorder as a genuine condition. Noticing early, and staying aware of your own habits, is the single most useful thing you can do.

The tools above are built around what the research on healthy technology use actually supports: awareness of your own usage, limits you set for yourself, and reminders that arrive at the right moment rather than generic warnings. None of it is about shame. It is about staying in the driver's seat.

Signs worth paying attention to

None of these mean something is wrong on their own, but if several ring true and they bother you, they are worth a thought:

• spending much longer here than you meant to, often;
• needing more, or more intense, content to feel the same;
• it getting in the way of sleep, work, relationships, or things you used to enjoy;
• trying to cut back and finding it harder than you expected;
• feeling low, anxious, or out of control around it.

Where to get real support

If any of this resonates, talking to someone helps, and it works. The most strongly evidence-backed approaches for problematic sexual or pornography-related habits are talking therapies, in particular cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). A doctor or a licensed therapist can point you to the right support for where you live.

• Speak to your doctor or your national health service; you can ask for a referral to a therapist experienced with compulsive sexual behaviour.
• If you are ever in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, please contact your local emergency services or a suicide-prevention helpline in your country right away. The International Association for Suicide Prevention keeps a directory of crisis centres worldwide at iasp.info.

Your privacy

These tools run on your own usage and stay private to your account. We do not share them, and turning the whole thing off is one switch away in your settings.